The Short and the Long of it – Fertility & Feelings Podcast

Introducing the Short and the Long of it - Fertility & Feelings podcast with Emma & Lara

For anyone going through fertility treatment or want to know more about it …two (psychologist) friends talk about their fertility journeys (one in it & one successfully out the other side), their experiences, emotions, and coping tactics.
 
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Fertility – Stress and Overwhelm

Struggling with fertility can be overwhelming, and the stress is real - studies even compare it to the impact of a major medical diagnosis. In this episode, we dive into the emotional toll, what happens when stress tips into overwhelm, and the coping strategies that help. 
As you'll see, in the excitement of it all, we even get the name of the podcast wrong  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Episode Notes
2:32 - definition of stress2:46 - definition of overwhelm3:07 - the reality of dealing with infertility/ IVF7:15 - IVF without NHS funding & big career moves9:27 - financial funding / packages10:54 - the impact of stress and infertility14:34 - being everything to everyone16:54 - when stress tips into overwhelm17:38 - not fit for human consumption days 18:26 - effort doesn’t always equal reward20:25 - fertility burnout 21:33 - infertility is like running a marathon23:33 - draining your stress bucket25:20 - grabbing moments of self-care 26:34 - telling other people you’ve failed28:43 - supporting your mind as much as your body29:57 - control and giving yourself permission to hope31:23 - trust and communication with your partner32:08 - being stressed about being stressed36:35 - infertility is a unique stress37:19 - coping mechanisms and creating space for yourself39:04 - reconciling with the idea that it’s not working40:52 - wallowing in the darkness when it all gets too much 42:33 - talking about feelings with your partner46:29 - the stress of disenfranchised grief 48:30 - opening up and finding your tribe50:40 - motherhood is a gift57:06 - recap of coping mechanisms
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Fertility - Shame & Guilt

Experiencing failures when trying to conceive and the associated feelings of shame can be debilitating.  In this episode we talk about how shame can hold us back from making connections, getting the support you need and remind you that you are not defined by a failure and are never alone.
Episode Notes
1:42 - definition of shame3:24 - definition of guilt5:32 - the difference between shame and guilt6:39 - it’s not all on you, it’s not your fault8:26 - an essential mindset shift to help deal with feelings of shame10:13 - shame triggers12:23 - shame requires constant self-talk13:00 - judgement and your shame bubble14:07 - when other things going well make your question yourself 15:07 - slipping into a lack of trust around others16:55 - guilt and engaging with the world 20:01 - shame makes you question your identity20:50 - separating yourself and facts from your thoughts 22:31 - what happens in a shame spiral23:57 - the expectation reality gap25:17 - feeling pregnant - motivator or fear?28:43 - will my partner leave me?30:16 - does visualisation work?32:54 - the stories you tell yourself 34:17 - belonging and feeling accepted35:58 - personality traits and building resilience37:07 - the value in saying ‘everything is fine’38:05 - everyone needs a f*ck it switch40:09 - unpicking your brain42:29 - dealing with a Big Fat Negative53:01 - you are not your failure55:30 - navigating compassion and comfort1:01:11 - we’re all human, emotions are normal
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